Hope is Greater than Fear

I never thought that I would have the courage to start a blog. I have never thought of myself as a great writer, and I feel that this is something totally outside my comfort zone. But what I do know is that I have the ability to make a difference and do whatever I can to be an inspiration to people on all sorts of levels. If I am able to touch one person a day with my story I have given myself a new hope. The idea to start a blog came to me after I spend a weekend in Denver at the National MS Society Leadership Conference. The people that I met are true heroes in making a difference in the world of MS and I want to do my part and join them in this fight.

My name is Meghan Melone and I am a patient of Multiple Sclerosis. I was diagnosed with this life changing disease at the young age of 14. I vividly remember the number events that led to my diagnosis like they all happened yesterday. My first symptom I had experienced was optic neuritis, which caused me to lose vision in my right eye for almost five months. At the time I was in 8^th grade and just trying to figure out how to be a pre-teen. The doctors that I had visited where stunned and confused and didn’t make a diagnosis due to my age and rarity of it actually being MS. As time went on my vision came back and I was back to a normal kid. My days carried on playing the sports that I loved so much and my dreams grew of playing a sport one day in college. I was making all the right moves to become a strong athlete in my high school days and hopefully past then. I went on the graduate junior high and thought nothing could stop me now. That summer was filled with sports camps and getting ready to be a tiny freshman in a big world of high school. Everything seemed to be going according to my plan until October 31^st. That Sunday started off as any old Sunday, until both of my feet went numb while I was trick or treating with my best friends. As the week grew on I tried to fight the numbness off and put it on the back burner, I was too busy at varsity basketball tryouts to think of the reality that was going on in my body. By the end of the week the numbness had crept its way up to my hips, just like rising water it was impossible to ignore. It felt like in the blink of an eye I was struggling to even move around let alone be running up and down a basketball court at full speed. I had seemed to stump doctors at the possibility that at 14 I was battling MS. It felt like years just trying to get answers. Ten years ago I posed as more of a liability for doctors than as a patient they could see in their office. I wasn't really old enough to see an adult doctor but at the time pediatric neurology didn’t really exist. All of my questions were answered a week before Christmas when my spinal tap results came back stating the Multiple Sclerosis was the monster that was lurking around every corner. I am not going to lie, I was scared and spent several weeks in a dark place. In the beginning denial was my best friend; it didn’t seem fair, I had just started my teenage life but I didn’t have time to act like a kid. Growing up and facing my fears head on was my only option. 

I was standing at the crossroads of two different paths; be in denial and hide this from the world or share my story with pride and make a difference. I chose the second option. Throughout the ten years that I have been battling this disease I have had some extremely amazing moments but at the same time I have had some horribly dark ones as well. This is my journey that has shaped me into the person that I am today. The experiences that I have been able to have because of MS are ones that people may never have. Each morning I remind myself that today is a day where I can make each connection count. Somehow people are connected through MS, it is a lot more common that people may think. My dream is to make people educated of this disease; education is the foundation to making a difference. 

As I sit here approaching the ten year anniversary of my diagnosis I decided that I needed to do something more. I started small with a team for Walk MS called ‘Ohana’ 9 years ago, which has more than 200 members today. But my strength system of family and friends has shown me that I can accomplish so much more then I ever could have imagined. As I reflect on my years with MS I feel that I have experienced a lot, from a wheel chair to running miles, they all make up little pieces of my story. I want to inspire others to share their story and to connect with others who are part of the MS family. The future is unknown with this disease but if you’re afraid to face it you will miss out on the little moments that make you strong. The choice is yours how you want your story to go, I just started writing mine.